This exercise has been something I keep my eyes peeled out for every Friday noon – that’s when Gypsy Mama updates the next prompter for me to write, no holds-barred. 🙂
Risk has been something I am quite inclined to. I like the rush of new experiences, and the unknown beyond the now. Yeap.. the planner in me sometimes makes me slightly uncomfortable, but I notice as the planner in me grows, I am, interestingly, more inclined to take risks.
In fact, I know very well that breakthroughs will not come without risk. With the Almighty, all things are possible. Well… most of the time anyway, only condition being that humans work with Him, not against His advice.
Well, let me further explain that usually, when I take risks on my own with the Almighty, all things is indeed possible. Had massive breakthroughs in thoughts, perspectives, fears, abilities, skills, understanding, etc. On my own, many a times with a team, I see Him at work much, especially in transforming & healing hearts.
I guess a huge risk I took was with my heart. I won’t go into the details too much. Look at my tag-cloud under “heartache” / “processing” / “healing”, you’ll get the giest of it. I have pretty much kept myself pure for 30-some years of my existence. Simply cos I believe in the Divine Hands linking hearts. Actually, after getting through the swamp & trudging through the mud, I still promised the Almighty & my dear friends that I will not allow myself to grow old as a cynical old hag. I still believe & celebrate life & love, as He would have it.
Took what seemed a calculated risk after countless assurances from the Almighty, and observing much of the man’s life for over 3 years. Thought I had it all covered. I knew he had issues with commitment, to a certain extent. I always have this desire to see people healed, as a mentor. I even had some specific plans in walking through with him to heal.
Little did I realise that he was a Type A Commitmemt Phobic. Had some signs, which I guess I chose to hope would eventually go away if I continued praying. He was, afterall, making progress. Till he dropped the final bombshell: He wants out, completely, totally, forever.
In the midst of reeling out of control, some dear mates have tried their best to walk me through. Kudos to them, otherwise I would not have miraculously gotten to the 95% healed state am in currently. One friend sent me some chapters about commitment phobics & yeah, the description fit him to the tee.
I guess by the time I read the chapter, I have already worked through letting him go. So the advice of “this Type needs professional help… best is to let him go, unless he makes a marked & real change in the core of his perspective. Otherwise he will be a serial heart-breaker.”
A risk I took. With someone else’s choices affecting my life massively. On hindsight, I am thankful I took the risk, because I realise what I am capable of with the Almighty. I now undersrand the extent of unconditional love the Almighty is willing to go to love me – through the process of learning to love him unconditionally, warts & inconsistencies & all. And the pain has now been turned into a depth of intimacy I’ve never had before with the Almighty. And to top it off, I found another dormant passion: blogging!
A ship in harbor is safe – but that is not what ships are for. ~John A. Shedd, Salt from My Attic
Of course, not forgetting the new friendships, the deeper love with family, and realising more specifically, my place in the Kingdom. ↖(^ω^)↗
Without taking that risk, I wouldn’t have known the pain & healing involved, I wouldn’t have been able to understand fully what abandonement is about. I wouldn’t have found the deeper soaking in Him that I can get into.
I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it. ~Pablo Picasso