Curveballs, I seem never ready for them. Perhaps in the area of my happily-ever-after, at least, I am still unable to fully trust why Abba closes certain doors, when I ask Him to be clear.
Just a week ago, another curveball, which was slammed onto me, totally unexpected. Sounds familiar, feels totally similar to a forced closure 3 years ago. Reminded of that sting, but decided to take a brave step & trust that it’ll be better this round, cos things seemed to be falling into place. Then wham, the meteorite lands, unannounced, unexpectedly, unprepared for.
Am glad I have an understanding with the Almighty that I’m allowed to vent at Him, without being zapped. ^^ He’s put up with me pretty much all these years. And knowing Him, I know He’ll just wait for me to sizzle off & then puts in His comfort, reminders & wisdom.
I remembered when I saw this on my newsfeed: I did whisper a prayer over the impending relationship – that He’ll close the door, if it’s not going to be healthy / not good / damaging. Think His answer may be in that curveball, just that I was not ready, for the way, the timing of, the strength of pitch, the way the curveball came. *weak laughter*
So after all the ranting (in my last blog post) & some milling-the-last-conversations-to-death, I’ve come to a conclusion: there is most likely something beyond my knowledge & understanding that I’m being protected from, which I can’t see with my naked eye & fluttering heart.
I trust, all over again, in the loving heart & powerful hands of the Almighty. I pray for more wisdom, in the next steps I’ll take, in watching over my heart…