** Something written in 2009, still very apt today. More real in fact – the tangibility of His love. 🙂
Had been having a recent spurt of encounters with God which is redefining my understanding of “supernatural”. In the usual talk on supernatural, it is always stuff about healing, legs growing longer, cancer-heals, even raising from the dead. I came to thought about it : these are beyond the natural, above our human comprehension how the cells can be revived /restored to brand new / viruses disappearing from the body – just like that.
Nope, I’ve not had the tangible angelic visits. Even better – I have encountered God & have started to understand a new dimension of how He works with me as someone loved by Him. Have been told by many that I am a person of many burdens – stuff that happens around me does stick with me for a while, maybe a God-given desire to do something about it. eg. Child-prostitutes restoration.
There is a couple of quiet places that God has been calling me to – places where I can hear my inner thoughts, and hear my back-&-forth discussions with my Bestest Friend. Many a times, I realise, are times when a huge myriad of thoughts just assails my mind & heart – coming from all directions. Often, I do not realise it till I’m in the Quiet Place(s). Usually, it is an enclosed space – eg. toilet with a comfy enough throne + no smell of course. Or in a dark & wide space – eg. large empty hall / room.
In these spaces, I can bear my heart, without needing to keep dignity / ensuring I still look glam, without fear of judgement, without “I told you so” speeches, without essentially, external stuff which will add to the turmoiled / stuck heart. In the start of the 10-15 mins of “Quiet-time”, I usually have thoughts being cannoned @ my Listener – concerns, desires, disappointments, hopes, dreams, stuff I have seen on the news, etc.
After sitting through my 5 mins barrage, and my heart is sorta emptied of the stuff which has bugged me / attached itself to me unknowingly, God just goes on to whisper something totally irrelevant to what I’ve been barraging about. Eg. I can be concerned abt my family’s salvation, and He goes & tells me “I love you, kiddo.” Ever had that?
But irrational as it sounds : it was the most needed thing at that point for me to hear.
I know cos it will hush my heart’s barrage, storms, turmoils. It just settles me – like a baby who’ll go “coo” in her daddy’s arms. This is where I increasingly recognise that God knows me – to the very last cell I have – all ‘cos He created me, and not just that, He made a commitment to love me for my entire existence on earth.
Did I come out of the Quiet Place knowing answers to my questions / solutions to my problems? Actually no. However, i came out with a deep sense of God’s watching over my life, that the answer will come in time, that the wisdom needed (if needed) will show up when i need it.
Coming out of there, calm as in the eye of the tornado, cos of the “irrational” whispers which comes from my supernatural God.
Do I understand the actual intricate cell-movements of my heart & mind that begets the calmness? – Nope…
Do I accept the inexplicable peace that has been given by God? – ooo yeah! =)
O Lord, You have searched me & You know me – Psalm 139:1
Words of Martin Luther King. (Courtesy of Dead Sea Scrolls Exhibition in SG in Sep-09.)
October 6, 2009 at 1:09pm